the paranoia is getting less and less. i feel the improvement in the term "so over it". yes i am tres proud that i deserve a delicious slice of cake. on the other hand i am not ready nor do i ever want to ever have to deal with that conversation. maybe the whole deprivation episode has put me in a place where i tend to be more heartless and maybe a bit more meh. so how do i explain that to someone who's obviously gone a little too far by going through that whole possessively smitten phase that scares me now? maybe taking that step towards a life-change did somewhat alter somebody's life but i don't think it is really mine. not to a certain extend where i'll go crawling everytime i hear that name. try explaining that.
my oh my. what did i get myself into now?!
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